We Still Call Him "B. R."

Yes, at less than 18 lbs., he's still our Baby Raleigh. He took his first official steps (4 of them to be exact) on August 12th. In a few short weeks he's mastered walking. Since he's so little it's just too cute to see him practically running all over the house. And just in the past couple weeks Raleigh loves bringing us books and climbing up on the couch to be read to. His favorite books are "The Very Busy Spider," "Dinosaurs Roar," and "The Very Quiet Cricket." He's also recently learned to point, stack blocks, climb on and off Tennyson's bed, and feed himself with a spoon and fork. And given the "Mickey Mouse Clubhouse" or "Curious George" themes songs, and he will boogie with the best of them! It's adorable to see our little dude dance!

There are some things that haven't changed much. Raleigh still l-o-v-e-s to be held close and snuggled, something this mommy will never tire of. He brings unimaginable joy and laughter to our home. I could sit for hours and watch him play with cars or trains. He makes the cutest "boy noises," like the sound of cars driving all over the floor. Raleigh loves to give kisses, too, especially to his big brother. It warms my heart to see them loving on each other. I hope that continues as they grow.

Catching Up

Oh my, I just can't seem to find the time to blog anymore. These little men keep me so busy! And when I do find a few minutes to myself I always seem to spend it cleaning....or sleeping. Not that I am complaining, so goes the life of a stay-at-home mommy. Part of me thinks "but I have nothing to blog about. Who wants to read about my 'boring' life?" But truthfully, it's so NOT boring! I mean, it might be to some, but I really need to keep up better with my blog so I can look back and remember these days, when my boys were little and what our day-to-day lives were like. Right now it's my whole existence, raising these boys, but in the not too distant future I will forget all the little things that make up our days like:

~ Tennyson correcting us if we "accidentally" call Raleigh "Sweet Boy." He says, "No, I am Sweet Boy. He is Baby Raleigh."

~ Raleigh waving bye-bye with his whole arm to Tom as he leaves for work. (He used to do a cute little backwards wave with just his fingers.)

~ The boys playing in the tub together and then endlessly kissing and hugging each other good night.

~ Tennyson hiding under the covers during storytime when the other parent comes into the room. Like we don't hear him giggling and see the covers moving.

~ The boys holding hands in the back seat as we run errands and then Tennyson says, "Look, Mommy, we being friends."

~ Raleigh "dancing" during the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse theme song by holding on to the table and rocking from side to side.

~ The sound of Raleigh breathing through the baby monitor.

~ Or the way they smell after a bath.

~ Or the sight of them playing ball together in the backyard.

~ Or how tired we always seem to be yet supremely happy.

I don't want to forget any of these moments. I've waited for them my whole life. To see my children playing together is bliss (when they play nicely, of course).

Obviously some days are better than others. Some days I feel like all I do is carry Raleigh on my hip, discipline Tennyson, and clean up their messes. Getting the laundry done and taking a shower is still cause for rejoicing. But I rest in the knowledge that I am right where I need to be. And that's enough for me....every day.

In the Blink of an Eye

**I haven't been on my blog in for-ever.....and I JUST discovered this unpublished post from April 10th! It's over two months old, and Raleigh has changed SO much since then!**

All at once our little Raleigh baby has taken off. He started crawling on March 27th (8 months and 7 seven days old), which if you go by his due date he technically wasn't even seven months old yet. Haha! Last Sunday, April 4th, Raleigh said "Mama" for the first time. What a tender moment for a mommy's heart! And last night I put him in his crib so I could put the boys' laundry away and he pulled himself up to his feet for the first time! He was so proud of himself he just started giggling. Of course, I got all teary and just hugged him saying, "No, Mommy's not ready for you to do that yet!" But I really was so proud and excited! Raleigh is also trying to climb the stairs, now that I am really not ready for!

Raleigh continues to bring us such joy and well, not much rest. He's starting to sleep longer stretches at night, but really, I don't mind it. Someday I'll miss his sweet smell and his little body curled up next to mine at night. *sigh* Why can't I stop time....just for a moment.

Reevaluating

Ever since I became a mother nearly three years ago almost everything in my life has changed, and most of it for the better. My full-time job is now taking care of my children. My relationship with my husband has been taken to a deeper level. My house isn't as clean and organized as it used to be. And my friendships have changed dramatically.

Lately I have been feeling forgotten by my friends - left out of social gatherings and parties. I guess it's because I haven't been around much since Raleigh's birth, and admittedly, I haven't been the best at keeping in touch. But taking care of two little ones and trying to do all the things running a household requires plus trying to earn money to make ends meet doesn't leave any time for socialization. Aside from those reasons, Raleigh is still (at 8 months old) depending solely on me for food (though secretly I don't mind a bit), so needless to say he goes everywhere with me.

Honestly, I am not sorry for putting my motherly and wifely duties first. I have to. I am the one that keeps everything running. I recognize that as an introvert I have to make a conscience effort to be social. I'd much rather be home with my little family. I am learning not to take everything so personally. Maybe they don't like me anymore because my kids are so darn cute and they are jealous? Haha! Okay, that's probably not the real reason.

A week or so ago here is how my Facebook said read "Brittany is reevaluating her friendships and trying not to take everything so personally. There are a few friends I hold most dear, that I could count on for anything. They love me no matter what and we are there for each other. I can't be all things to all people, and frankly, I'm not gonna try." Almost immediately several of my friends e-mailed me saying they knew exactly what I was going through. I appreciated that so much. It meant that I wasn't crazy or a bad person for reevaluating who my friends really were.

I do find myself relying mostly on those friends that are in the same place I am right now, home with little ones. And since my time is valuable I am realizing that I need to step away from my high-maintenance friendships. I simply can't do it all. I can't maintain a house, give my husband and sons what they need, and try to keep alive one-sided friendships.

Anyway, I just needed to get all this out. My blog is really my only outlet. And I don't know if anyone reads it, but that's what's going on with me right now. Reevaluating, yet thanking God for every blessing that keeps my life full.

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In Case You are Wondering....

It's amazing how many people have asked us if we are going to "try for a girl." Even after we had Tennyson the question began to surface, but now it's like people just assume that since we have 2 boys that we want or need a girl.

The short answer to the prying question is "NO!" I am already so miffed at being asked that it's starting to go something like this, "So...are you gonna try for a girl?" My response, "WHY would I do that?" Besides that, I don't think it's right trying for a boy or girl that you may or may not get and ending up with more kids than you intended to or can afford.

Truthfully, I always wanted boys. I am so not a girly-girl. I hate shopping for clothes and shoes (just ask Tom). When I was growing up I spent more time playing with my brother's G.I. Joe's and climbing trees than playing house. And besides, should I need some girl time I have 3 sisters, 3 sisters-in-law, and lots of friends.

I am not one of these women with a burning desire to have a daughter. I love, love, love having little "Toms" around. To see the bond Tom has with his sons is indescribable. It's great having trains, trucks, and Hot Wheels cars all over the house! (And for the record, I would not deal well with a Drama Queen. There's no chance of that with sons!)

I realize that at 31 I don't have to make a decision about baby #3 right now. But always in the back of my mind is the fact that I would have to have a third c-section, and after the difficult time I had with Raleigh I am not sure I want to go through that again. Deciding to have a third would be based on us wanting a third no matter what the gender. Sometimes it's easy to think, "Oh, let's have another. All my friends are pregnant!" (I think I have the most fertile friends in the world! Haha!) But I really want time to enjoy and nurture each child individually, especially in the early years. My parents did lots of things right, but I rarely got one-on-one time with 6 brothers and sisters around, so I don't want to have that "problem," no matter if we have 2 kids or 3.

So yeah, lots to think about. But thankfully, I am not in a hurry. I am just enjoying these days raising my 2 wonderful boys! I'm sure gonna miss it someday.

My Darling Boy ~ A Tennyson Update

Ah, finally an update on Tennyson. Poor little guy, now that there is a baby in the house he just doesn't get the blogging time he deserves! Well, Tennyson is doing and saying so many new things now, I genuinely can't keep up. And now that his vocabulary has expanded to include words like "probably" and "convertible," conversations with him have gotten increasingly hilarious. Here are a few examples of some funny things he's said recently:

2.2010 ~ We have been having major bedtime battles with Tennyson that started the day we began to pack up at the old house, so it's been going on for-ever. Anyway, sometime last week I went to check on him around 10:30 or so, only to open his door to find him quietly playing in his room. I calmly said, "Oh, we thought you were asleep." My 2-year old's response, "I was sleeping with my eyes open." Are you kidding me?! Haha!

2.22.10 ~ During dinner I must have been eating quickly (as usual) because Tennyson looked at me and said, "Mommy, you must be starving!"

2.24.10 ~ There is a corner of the rug in our room that was slightly chewed up by some visiting canines a few years ago. On this particular day Tennyson remarked on this (again) and this time I said, "Who did that?" He said, "Cameron and Sara did it." So funny and random that he would blame it on my brother and sister-in-law!

2.28.10 ~ Tennyson came downstairs last night saying something was wrong in his room. So I went upstairs to check it out. He kept pointing at the floor and when I found the tiny piece of carpet he was referring to I told him it was okay, nothing was wrong. He said, "Mommy, I broke you floor."

3.1.10 ~ When Tennyson's nails need to be cut and they are dirty underneath I tell him it's dirt and germs. Today after I cut his nails he looked in the sink and said, "Look at all those germs!"

I realize that since we are Tennyson's parents we think he's something extra special, but Tennyson genuinely lights up whatever room he is in. Everyone seems to be drawn to him, from the teachers at BRCS begging Tom to bring him in to my family who just loves to be around him. As the previous stories illustrate, Tennyson is highly entertaining!

I have been asked (already?!) if we are going to put him in preschool, but truthfully he's knows everything they would teach him anyway. (Besides, we can't afford it right now.) Tennyson has known all his colors and shapes for a year now, but now he can count to 11 ("But this one goes to 11.") Tennyson knows the alphabet and often breaks into the "Super Why" version of it. He knows every letter and number by sight, too, not just singing them. And you can have a intelligible conversation with him like you would a 4 year old. Tennyson recently started asking "What does that spell?" when we are reading to him. He asks poignant questions about things and already wants to know "Why?" and "What is that thing called?" My parents always said the smartest kids ask a lot of questions. :-)

Of course I can't talk about my darling boy without mentioning his ever increasing love of trains. For Christmas we got him Thomas the Tank Engine appliques to put all over his wall. So he often sits there and names all the trains. He can put together an impressive track, too, both the wooden and plastic ones. And his room is now complete with Thomas sheets and comforter, too. It's such a cute boy's room! He spends a lot of time in there just playing trains. It really is quite precious.

Check out the awesome guitar-shaped track he built by himself!

Playing trains with Daddy

Life is never dull with Tennyson around. He talks non-stop, and breaking into "Jingle Bells" and "Little Drummer Boy" are still a common occurrence. He loves to take off his sock and say, "Look, piggy toes!" And then remove the other one and says, "Look, MORE piggy toes!" Tennyson's other new thing is to show up his "food" after he eats something. It started with Tom saying he was going to eat it and Tennyson showing us that it's in his tummy instead. Yes, our boy is ridiculous!

Showing us what he ate, in this case it's carrots and grapes.
Tennyson continues to be a dream big brother, and he and Raleigh have really begun that legendary brotherly bond. Raleigh giggles and laughs just watching Tennyson jump and run around, but he especially loves playing peek-a-boo with him. Tennyson showers "baby brudder" with so much love and affection. I really never expected they would bond so well, so quickly.

Wearing Daddy's snowy boots

This was taken after the big snow on the way to my brother's to watch the Superbowl.

I could write a book our energetic, lovable, funny little boy. Tom asked him last week, "Are you a monkey?" Tennyson responded, "No, I a sweet boy." He sure is.....